Neighbourhood Warfare

[Yamumzbum]

I'd like to think I'm a pretty good neighbour, I often walk my elderly neighbours dog from one side of me and the other lady I pay off with buds so I don't have to worry about them occasionally copping a woft from my unit at flower time, and I'm always friendly with everyone.. except this one bitch.

She is a dead set cunt. An ex heroin addict who hates the world and everyone in it.



My brother and me were standing on my balcony (I'm on 2nd level,cunt lives on ground floor coz she's a fukn scrubber) having a chat about who knows and I hear someone tell out "what are youse looking at?" and I look down and it's this cunt standing in her dog shit riddled back yard staring up at us. She says "stop talkin about me will youse!" and I politely explained that we had far more interesting things to be discussing than her and she says "nah not you the other one!" and points to my brother so we both just walked back inside so as not to antagonise the irate junkie downstairs.



A week or so later we both happen to be checking our letterboxes at the same time,, bad timing I know. Anyway not a word was said, I had my dog sophie with me, and as she was walking away Soph walked over to her so I said in a stern but calm voice but just loud enough for her to hear "stay away from her Sophie!" and this bitch erupts and screams "Awww faark off!" and I said "no you fuck off Alex" coz that's the cunts name.. obviously her parents thought she was a cunt too. I said "my brother has autism (he doesn't although I sometimes wonder) and if he just happens to look down into your backyard then fukn deal with it!" and I followed it up with a jaunty "Go fuck yourself!" and I strolled away.



Now, to the real reason for my post.. every year this cunt downstairs grows a humongous dope plant right in the middle of her backyard amongst the horse sized shits her dog does and I've been hatching a plan to ruin this bitches crop and I've thought of three ideas.. first is super soaker with good ol roundup and one night just quietly douse her plant with that lovely stuff. The second idea was the ol pollen bomb and chuck a few bombs down there one night to seed her bud.

The third idea would be a little difficult but hilarious nonetheless. loading up my fishing rod with some heavy gauge line and fishing that bitch right out of the ground and dragging it back up onto my veranda. Fuck I'd pay to see her face the next morning lol.



Open to suggestions.
Or should I just let bogans be bogans (thats the saying isn't it?) and keep the peace?

 

[HGO]

well if you want to continue to grow where you are I'd probably not antagonize her by fucking with her plant
she might dob ya in to the cops as payback
maybe just fuck with her head a bit , you know sign her up for visits from the mormons , jehovas and any other cnuts you could get to pay her a visit . save up some piss in a bottle so it gets nice and funky then pour it over the balcony onto her patio
put up flyers around the neighborhood advertising free stuff only cookers would want but use her address

 

[med180]

I like your pollination idea. Like HGO suggests, try something subtle. Cunts will be Cunts, and things can always be worse, especially when you piss of a cunt!...don't poke the angry bear, is this the hill you want to die on?

 

[Old fox]

Let bogans be bogans. You don't want to potentially attract attention if you're growing cannabis at your place, especially if someone in the vicinity calls the cops. De-escalate.

 

[benn0]

If its happening on a regular basis, like say pension day, its probably ice use unfortunately, my sister had the same issue every fortnight and about 3 days after until the she-male that lived three doors down went to sleep.

On the other note, I'd probably use a fuckload of gibberelin in an attempt to make it herm, if not roundup all the way, leave about a quarter to an 8th of the plant untouched and she sounds crazy enough to try and smoke it in the end

 

[snooze]

I'd like to think I'm a pretty good neighbour, I often walk my elderly neighbours dog from one side of me and the other lady I pay off with buds so I don't have to worry about them occasionally copping a woft from my unit at flower time, and I'm always friendly with everyone.. except this one bitch.

She is a dead set cunt. An ex heroin addict who hates the world and everyone in it.



My brother and me were standing on my balcony (I'm on 2nd level,cunt lives on ground floor coz she's a fukn scrubber) having a chat about who knows and I hear someone tell out "what are youse looking at?" and I look down and it's this cunt standing in her dog shit riddled back yard staring up at us. She says "stop talkin about me will youse!" and I politely explained that we had far more interesting things to be discussing than her and she says "nah not you the other one!" and points to my brother so we both just walked back inside so as not to antagonise the irate junkie downstairs.



A week or so later we both happen to be checking our letterboxes at the same time,, bad timing I know. Anyway not a word was said, I had my dog sophie with me, and as she was walking away Soph walked over to her so I said in a stern but calm voice but just loud enough for her to hear "stay away from her Sophie!" and this bitch erupts and screams "Awww faark off!" and I said "no you fuck off Alex" coz that's the cunts name.. obviously her parents thought she was a cunt too. I said "my brother has autism (he doesn't although I sometimes wonder) and if he just happens to look down into your backyard then fukn deal with it!" and I followed it up with a jaunty "Go fuck yourself!" and I strolled away.



Now, to the real reason for my post.. every year this cunt downstairs grows a humongous dope plant right in the middle of her backyard amongst the horse sized shits her dog does and I've been hatching a plan to ruin this bitches crop and I've thought of three ideas.. first is super soaker with good ol roundup and one night just quietly douse her plant with that lovely stuff. The second idea was the ol pollen bomb and chuck a few bombs down there one night to seed her bud.

The third idea would be a little difficult but hilarious nonetheless. loading up my fishing rod with some heavy gauge line and fishing that bitch right out of the ground and dragging it back up onto my veranda. Fuck I'd pay to see her face the next morning lol.



Open to suggestions.
Or should I just let bogans be bogans (thats the saying isn't it?) and keep the peace?

Give her a fuck and shut her up

 

[Johnny Walker]

Want to be careful she might burn ya house down.

 

[Beil]

I've always figured leave it alone if there's a chance it could bite you.
She's a cunt, you know it, the other neighbours know it. If she's really a flog, she'll fuck up along the way anyway or either yourself or her will move.

I do like the pollen idea though. Nicking the plant will have her looking, cooking it with glyphosate could do the same or actually hurt her (maybe, might just give her a bad cough).
But pollen bombing her plant (as long as you can do it without leaving 'packages' in her yard will just confuse the shit out of her lol.

 

[Goonie Goat]

You could have born again Christians as neighbours. The clueless cunts next door burn green wood in their fireplace and it smogs up the whole block. Same thing with their charcoal barbecue. I'd love to chuck some dog turds on it but it already smells like shit anyway..